Sunday, 16 May 2010

Its a Dogs Life

I've decided to form a coalition with the dog. I've got some difficult decisions to make and He seems to have it sussed. He sleeps all day and only wakes to be fed and walkies. Then its all about chasing his ball but refusing to bring the ball back. It's his moment of the day when it's his game and his rules although you could say he rules the day anyway. He sleeps when he wants but apart from that he's fairly content to let me dictate the rest.

Whys he so bloody content?
What does he know that I don't?

You'd think that perhaps the stark knowledge of his own mortality would spur him into sweating (or panting) over some great piece of doggy art or furthering the desperate cause for doggy rights or fighting the seemingly ne'er ending battle between the canine and their feline counterparts.
Where's the great doggy Poets, Politicians or philosophers? Do you think the Andrex puppy is like some doggy Justin Beiber? Perhaps unbeknown to us our pooches have a secret stash of old andrex wrappers that they hang up and swoon over when we're all in bed.

Somehow I think not.

No dogs have it sussed. You'd think he might be awake more often contemplating life but perhaps he has and realised its not worth it. They don't worry themselves about trivia like ambition self fulfilment or philanthropy. They jus go for the basics. A full tummy and something to amuse them in-between the sleeping and the filling.
They have an acute sense of timing. You can set you clock for 3.30 by the howls that emanate for dinner at that time but that sense of timing does not extend to an urgent need to leave a dent on history. He's happy just to leave his temporary mark (twice a day)

So the votes are in and I have no option but to forge an alliance, a coalition to give it it's buzz word. I shall be endorsing and accepting some of the dogs polices and I hope he will reciprocate.
I'm a little unsure where he stands on the quality of Prince's output since Love-sexy but we do see eye to eye on sleeping and eating yet differ on quantity and amount.
He of course will eat anything including that moon rock like substance that they call 'biscuits'. Doesn't look anything like a Jaffa cake to me. I will endorse his right to eat biscuits but decline supporting the eating as such and at the point of the crucial vote, I shall look away and focus on something else while humming a merry toon so as not to upset the delicate balance of our fragile relationship.

But he's got me on the sleeping. 18 hours a day minimum has always sounded about right. Its a cliche but I gave up sleep for rock n roll, sleep when I'm dead an all that. Don't get me wrong I'm not an insomniac, far from it, never had a problem with that, off with fairies me as soon as the head hits the down. No there's too much to do, last one standing, first in line, people to see, places to go, Ive got no time to sleep but with my new found coalition with the dog perhaps I'll see the error o my ways and wake to a new dawn, metaphorically speaking, where I realise that sleeping 18 hours a day minimum is in fact what's best for the house and country as a whole. Let's face it why has 3 hours sleep a night got me? Big bags and a grumpy vibe in the morning. Yes I can get more done but perhaps like the dog it's jus not worth it


Perhaps I shall jus accept that me and the dog live in the same house and with an open mind we can make judgements and try to get along and that's about the size of it. He's not a dog and I'm not a person. We're both examples of a way to pass the time till we shuffle off this mortal coil and we can all learn from each other.

Labels can be misguiding and judgemental. We don't need Tories, Labour or Lib Dems, we need action. Necessity is the mother of invention. Its not a race so no one lost and no one won.
We should all just give these buggers a chance and see what they come up with. It'll probably just be the same crooked brown paper bag politics that we've always had but lets not fall at the first hurdle and judge them just because they are or are not following some rigid party line. We don't live in China for gawds sake. People can change their mind. We voted for ch ch change and we've got it. We're quite aware of what we're going through

Of course I, like the dog will metaphorically sleep through the next 5 years and come up smelling of roses.

Fasten seat belts, doors to manual...

Chucky B xx